Personal responsibility is about our attitude to ourselves. It’s about seeing ourselves as the active agent at the centre of things. As a result, any changes we make in our behaviour can give any of our relationships a boost – maybe strengthening a friendship, ending an old feud or simply creating a better atmosphere – which can, in turn, affect our whole network.
Openness is about our attitude to others and what they care about. It takes openness sustained over a period of time to build (or rebuild) relationships. To understand the human needs underlying the thoughts and actions of other people – and our own. And to constantly seek to expand communication bandwidth between ‘us’ and ‘them’ so there’s resilience in our relationships, even where there’s disagreement.
Creativity is about the potential for each and every conversation to create something of value – by addressing the basic needs of those involved. This spirit of creativity can take some work to develop. It has to be quite robust – stubborn, even – as our needs are often expressed in a negative form precisely because they’re not being met.